She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
