This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
