its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
