What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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