i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
