So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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