i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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