that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
where are you?
Hypothermia
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
