Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
