i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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