The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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