Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
