Grow some girl-balls and come out already
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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