I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
