Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize