whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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