I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
