I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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