We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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