Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
