I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
