I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
