On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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