Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
