Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
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