Small penises have feelings too.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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