i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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