Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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