Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Is it penis luge time yet?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
