I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
