youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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