Rock
Scissors
Fuck
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
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