suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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