there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
