Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
