fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
