two words: eviction party
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
