I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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