to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize