You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize