wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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