apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
