Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
