just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
