Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
