all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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