the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
