Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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