Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
