If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
