my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
